The dude has got no mercy
As a lad, I watched a lot of Mystery Science Theater 30000. Like, a LOT. And as devotees of that show know, when a dude hits another dude in whatever movie's being watched, Joel/Mike and the 'bots shout "Hi-keeba!" or "Gymkata!" Now, "Hi-keeba" was a line from one of their earlier movies, so that explains that. A mystery of my youth that I never bothered to solve was what the hell "gymkata" was all about. I knew it was a movie, but figured it to be a generic action flick with a weird name that the MST writing staff latched onto.
The truth is so much better.
Gymkata, for those of you who don't know, is a movie about a dude who MUST COMBINE GYMNASTICS AND KARATE INTO A NEW MARTIAL ART IN ORDER TO WIN A RIDICULOUS TOURNAMENT IN SOME MADE-UP FOREIGN COUNTRY SO THAT THE USA CAN BULID A STAR WARS SITE THERE.
Just drink that premise in. Drink deep.
...
That's just the greatest. Also the greatest? This tagline: "The skill of gymnastics, the kill of karate."
That retroactively makes every MST reference to it so much funnier.
The truth is so much better.
Gymkata, for those of you who don't know, is a movie about a dude who MUST COMBINE GYMNASTICS AND KARATE INTO A NEW MARTIAL ART IN ORDER TO WIN A RIDICULOUS TOURNAMENT IN SOME MADE-UP FOREIGN COUNTRY SO THAT THE USA CAN BULID A STAR WARS SITE THERE.
Just drink that premise in. Drink deep.
...
That's just the greatest. Also the greatest? This tagline: "The skill of gymnastics, the kill of karate."
That retroactively makes every MST reference to it so much funnier.
posted by Jeff at 10:46 AM
9 Comments:
This film is based on a novel!
"Gymkata, for those of you who don't know, is a movie about a dude who MUST COMBINE GYMNASTICS AND KARATE INTO A NEW MARTIAL ART IN ORDER TO WIN A RIDICULOUS TOURNAMENT IN SOME MADE-UP FOREIGN COUNTRY SO THAT THE USA CAN BULID A STAR WARS SITE THERE."
Sounds like a Van Damme movie. Only without the Star Wars, of course.
The VHS only costs $75! It's available used for $24! WHAT IS STOPPING YOU?
I've seen it a number of times, and yes, it's amazing. (Particularly the stone pommell horse sequence).
Anyway, the name of the Lakers' strength and conditioning coach is...
Jim Cotta.
Have you watched this yet?
If not, do give me a ring when you do.
Mike
Alex - "Jim Cotta"? I don't think this movie can live up to my expectations.
Mike - Rest assured, should a copy ever grace my doorstep, you will be the first person I call.
Gymkata actually *might* live up to your expectations. It's so goddamn weird.
* * *
Also checkout Future Hunters sometime. It has young Robert Patrick trying to recover the Spear of Destinty. And it has a chase scene that lasts an entire night and into the daytime.
Alex, Jim Cotta is the FORMER strength and conditioning coach of the Lakers. Emphasis on FORMER. I think now, Jim Cotta lives in a trailer somewhere in Tennessee.
About your "Jim Cotta" comment....
Better a former something, then a "never has been". By the way, since Jim left the Lakers, they haven't made it out of the first round of the play-offs.
In the words of Kid Rock, "I'm not straight outta Compton, I'm straight out the trailer!"
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