Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Random thought

If I had a regular column, be it magazine, online, or whatever, I would call it "I'm Shitty at This and I Hate You."

That strikes me as sooooo funny right now.

A bit about television

So it looks like they cancelled Threshold. Naturally the only new hour-long sci-fi/horror offering that's been canned is the one I actually watch. Meanwhile, Invasion plods and plods and plods along. You know, I don't think a handful of people being replaced by alien/mer-people/whatever-they-are qualifies as an "invasion," do you?

Emory and Leslie say Surface is good. I've missed too much at this point to jump in now, I think.

Everyone I know seems to hate Ana-Lucia on Lost. I still find her more pleasant than Jack, Kate, Sawyer, or Locke. At least she has a good reason for being a dick, you know? Like Locke did, until his self-righteousness overcame all the goodwill he had built up. ("You've got to push the button, Jack" was the deal-breaker, if you're curious.) If this week's episode keeps up the pace, Lost could actually become a good show again. Let's hope they actually tell us Kate's origin! I'd really like to like her, since she is so very pretty.

Stuff

New Atrox strip is up.

Sorry about the lack of updates this week. Mite busy, you know.

Monday, November 28, 2005

Weekend roundup

Special Four-Day Edition!

Thursday - Thanksgiving and Turducken at Nell's.

Friday - Packing, Mystery Science Theater 3000

Saturday - trip to the painting store, more packing, Liz and baby Sam, Syriana

Sunday - yet more packing, American Dad over at Frank and Matt's place (sans Frank)

And now, two-word reviews for movies I saw for the first time this weekend!

Syriana - Very good!

Garden State - Pretty irritating!

Ocean's Twelve - Mostly harmless!

Saturday, November 26, 2005

Learned this weekend...

...Turducken is effin' DELICIOUS.

Since it is a genetically engineered superbird created by science, Turducken has no bones. When Nell went to grab one of the legs, she pulled off this entire huge hunk of meat along with it. It took up 3/4 of her plate. We all insisted that she couldn't leave the table until she had finished the whole thing. She didn't actually finish it, but we let her get up because she was our hostess, after all. When I asked for a second helping she scooped a massive pile of it onto my plate, and I ate every bit of it because that shit was GOOD.

But why didn't they call it "Chuckey?" A lot easier to say.

Friday, November 25, 2005

Newness

New Atrox strip?

That's a big ten-four, good buddy.

Wednesday, November 23, 2005

Injustice

Aw, HELL no! They elimate Kim over Bre, the very episode that Bre becomes the show's new, diabolical villain? That shit ain't right. I think Kim's painting was the hardest to emulate, by the by. But seriously. Who knew Bre was crazy? Self-righteous, sure, but her behavior this episode was just out there.

Guess all my hopes now rest with Nicole, although I doubt she'll pull it off. Nik will probably win, which is fine. At least she is not an awful person.

What do you MEAN you don't watch Top Model?

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Packing

Last night I organized the contents of my top drawer, the place where I throw all my random bric-a-brac. Some random things about the experience.

Sorting through all your old financial records is like a tour of all your failures at being an adult. Oh, here's the list of things that were in my car when it was stolen! Oh, here's the repair bill for when I borrowed Ann's car and someone plowed into me! Oh, here's the notice for the first time my car was towed! Oh, here's a rather large pile of late notices from just about everyone I've ever owed money to! Not the most energizing experience, no.

I found my passport that I got renewed, thinking I was going to Europe with the Glee Club freshman year. That never panned out. They went the year after I graduated.

There were a bunch of photos I had forgetten I had nipped from home. Really old ones, from 2nd, 5th, and 6th grade. The one from 6th grade is great, since it is a massive group shot of us signing each other's 6th Grade Day T-shirts, and among the throng you can spot Daisy, Matt, Paul, and Brandon. And me, in the front, waving at my mom like the total hambone I am.

It's amazing, the things I hang on to. I unfolded a slightly rumpled piece of paper and found that it was receipt from a Bob's IGA grocery store that no longer exists. It's the receipt for a single rose I bought a girl in sixth grade. I had to think a long time to remember that I had brought it out to LA with me when I first left for college. The fact that it still has yet to be thrown away is a testament to what an impenetrable fortress my top drawer is.

Time to move on

Well, we signed the lease to our new place last night. Plus we actually got to see it. As promised, it was just like the one we saw months ago. And it had been cleaned up real purty. And despite our minor fears, we do have an actual balcony. You can see the Hollywood sign from there. It is awesome.

WOOOOOOOOOO! No more Glendale!

Monday, November 21, 2005

Troxilicious

New Atrox strip is up and about.

All-Star Superman

It's just the best thing ever. Of COURSE Jimmy Olsen takes a jetpack to work! Why not? Why the hell not?

The end of the week

This weekend, the password for action was... um... well, the weekend can't really be summed up in one word. "Drinking," maybe, but that's sort of embarssing.

Friday night we had our Moving Out/Emory and Leslie's Birthday Party at our place up in Glendale. It was a pretty low-key affair, which was nice, actually, and it was a fine mix of people, with Cinema House, Occidental, Claremont, the West side, and KC kids all represented. We talked about Top Model way too much. But everyone seemed to have a good time, anyway. PLUS, I didn't fall asleep before everyone left! Nor did I pass out in the bathroom! I totally fulfilled my goals for that party.

Saturday Leslie and I went to the bank and got our cashier's check to pay the first month's rent on the NEW PLACE. Then we met up with a large team of folks in Burbank to catch Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. (Spoilers ahead, if that deters you.) It's my favorite book of the series, so I'm pleased to report that the movie did not disappoint. Mike Newell is clearly more adept at comedy than action, so the big dragon chase wasn't particularly riveting, but all the teenage love angsty stuff was great. Plus Newell got some great performances out of all those great British actors. Nice to see them actually utilize Maggie Smith, for a change. And Brendan Gleeson was GREAT. Most importantly, the ending had all the emotional punch I hoped for. Although major characters die in each of the subsequent books, I don't think the series as a whole has topped the impact of Cedric dying. It's in that moment that the fun and games are over. Anyway, good movie.

Saturday night was Mayday, and I had planned on going, but then I didn't have a way there, and Leslie, Emory, Matt, and Andrea were going to Frank's show since it was the last night, and I wanted to see it again but hadn't yet, so to sum it up, I went to Frank's show instead. Sorry, Mayday people! I will enjoy your films on DVD! After the show, Frank and I went to the cast party and had a grand old time.

Frank wound up crashing at my place, so the next day we had lunch and then I recorded a bunch of Veronica Mars episodes for him. Man, that show is GREAT. That night we were supposed to go sign our lease, but our landlady called Leslie to reschedule, so Frank and I went down to the pier for our buddy Chris' birthday party/concert (he's a musician, see). It was more good times.

And now this relating of a series of events has come to a close!

Friday, November 18, 2005

The Madness

Here are the comics I'm most looking forward to in the next few months (except for Scott Pilgrim and Planetary, which I already mentioned).

All-Star Superman - I know the first issue just came out, but I haven't read it yet! I've heard it's insane. Nowadays, that's what I'm looking for.

Nextwave - Speaking of insane, here's the cover for the second issue of Nextwave, courtesy of Ellis and Immonen. Tell that's a comic you don't want to read and I will say you are wrong in the head.

ROCK!

Dudes. Emory and Leslie have this sweet new computer, and Emory's been using its power to download TV shows and burn them to DVDs, and just yesterday the complete run of Sifl and Olly finished downloading.

Honestly, people? I can't tell you how much this news fills my heart with song. In the rather dark days of the beginning of college, it was a bright spot. Freshman year I would confound my roommate by sneaking off at 4 PM to head to the common room and watch the second season. Bit by bit, my friends started watching with me, until S&O references were widely recognized and revered. That show was pure love. And while I'm glad Liam Lynch is finally getting mainstream success (he directed Jesus Is Magic and the upcoming Tenancious D movie, and "United States of Whatever" actually got some radio play, itself originally a Sifl and Olly song), I don't know if he'll ever top some of the stuff that took place on this fine program. Sugarbunny, the Tooth Fairy, Jargon Scott, Chester, Precious Roy... oh, Precious Roy.

In fact, here's a smidge of a Precious Roy bit where Sifl and Olly are selling Elf Motels:

Sifl: Hi everybody, welcome to the Precious Roy Home Shopping Network. I'm Sifl... and this is my friend Olly.

Olly: (breathes in deeply) Folks if you're like me your legs are all SCARRED UP AND ITCHY WITH ELF BITES. OOOOH, IT'S ITCHY. OOHH. You know you've tried the bug sprays, you left small poisonous cupcakes out for them, you've called the exterminator and every wizard in the phone book, but despite your attempts, you just can't get rid of these darn elves. You know. I bet, you know, you're asking me, Precious Roy how can I get rid of these fucking elves?

Sifl: Dude.

Olly: Folks, you're not dealing with a cockroach or a rat here. You're dealing with a small irritable magical man. Armed to the teeth with a thousand deadly jigs and dance steps.

Sifl: Oh you know the problems I've been having dancing with elves.

Olly: Sifl, You've had a lot of serious ass dirty dancing with elves problems. Folks, there's always vacancies at the Precious Roy Elf Hotel. Elves check in but they don't check out, YOU DIG MOTHER. You know, I know what you're thinking Sifl, you're thinking "How does it work?"

Sifl: No, actually I was thinking about Jaquiline Smith.

Olly: Exactly. Everyone knows that an elf can't resist a hooker in a Hotel room.

Sifl: What?

Olly: It's a simple equation folks. Prostitution, divided by Hotels, equals dead Elves. How does it work? The elves are attracted to the sign outside. "Hookers. I can't wait to get the hookers." They go in, hop in the sack and they try to do the horizontal jig in super glue for the last time. Those... Little... Bastards... Will... Pay... let's take, some calls.


It's the "small, irritable, magical man" line that always cracks me up. And the math equation at the end. And the way he says "Ooooh!" when his ankles are all itchy with elf bites.

It's all of it, really. All of it, forever and ever.

The ol' Statcounter

The best thing I've done for my readership numbers lately is mentioning the song "My Humps." Then again, those that come here looking to listen to it most likely end up a bit disappointed.

Boozle?

Man, that episode of Veronica Mars on Wednesday was WEIRD. The ads were all "Child abuse! An episode you'll never forget!" so I was thinking, "Man, this show is going from dark to pitch black," but then Emory and I actually watched the episode. It was HYSTERICAL. Argueably the most laugh-out-loud episode of the series ever. Logan was on point. Every exchange he has with Kendall made me laugh and laugh. And that quiet, well-behaved kid that Veronica babysat for? The speech his dad gives as he pays Veronica? Emory and I had to rewind it and watch it again. This whole episode was like something from the lighter side of Twin Peaks. And what was up with that ending? Weird, man. Weird.

In other news, Top Model is still the best/worst show on TV. I love how they eliminated Lisa solely on her heinous personality. "Jayla, you are a terrible model. Lisa, you take great pictures, but you are HORRENDOUS." I mean, I'm paraphrasing there, but that's the sentiment that was conveyed.

Thursday, November 17, 2005

Don't tell me that

There's a Yahoo Search banner ad making the rounds that says "How many spiders do you eat in your sleep? Find out with Yahoo Search!" or some such.

OH MY GOD THAT IS AWFUL. THE AMOUNT OF SPIDERS THAT HAVE ENTERED MY MOUTH IS THE LAST THING I WOULD EVER WANT TO CONSCIOUSLY BE AWARE OF. THAT IS SIMPLY HORRIBLE.

So the ad did not really make me want to use Yahoo Search, is what I'm saying.

We are not the only comics people out there

As much as I love shilling my own work, perhaps you should saunter over to Mastodon City for an exciting new edition of Junk Science. I think it's funny, but then I am a sucker for menacing birds and the name "Ambrose." I'm easy.

Comics 'a-plenty

Another day, another new strip up at the Atrox. Go read it. RIGHT NOW.

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

Kitty McNewStrip

A new Kitty-Face Kitty awaits you at the Atrox. Won't you stop by?

Thoughts that come while walking to Jack in the Box

In a parallel universe where Emory has an internet presence, his blog would be (or at least should be) called "Racial-Slur-Incited Punch in the Face," named for one of Emory's favorite/most despised film conventions.

Happy birthday, dickhead.

Botched at every turn

Nice to see that the Serenity DVD box art is just as ugly as every other piece of that film's promotional material. Sure would hate to break that streak. Ah, it'll clean up anyway. And since it cost 39 million and made 35 million worldwide, it looks like it will at least make its money back.

Silencio

Guess I have not had much to blog about the last few days. Sorry.

There's a new SMRT-TV this week, if it's any consolation. It includes a review of House by yours truly. Go nuts.

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

We didn't shut down the site

Leslie's come back to us, which means there's a new strip over at The Atrox. And there just might be some hot Kitty-Face Kitty action for you sometime this week. Clearly you should check the 'Trox every second you can!

Monday, November 14, 2005

Consumerism heals all wounds!

Things to brighten up the winter!

First! Planetary is not only back in January, it'll be MONTHLY! Yes, the last three issues will be hitting Jan, Feb, March, bam, bam, bam. It'll finally be over! Which will be sad. But I will get to read how it ends! Which is totally awesome. Then I just have to count the days until DC releases another "Absolute" edition...

Second! Scott Pilgrim! It's just the goddamn greatest.

Blah

Good Night and Good Luck? Totally pleasant. Really slight.

As Emory said, "Wow, taking down McCarthy was really easy."

Yuck duex

Last night I had a dream where my teeth fell out. Not one by one, mind you, but in big clumps connected by gum tissue.

It was unsettling.

Yuck

Jeff's thoughts while watching the first three episodes of Babylon 5: "Wow, I'm just as bored as I am when I watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. But at least TNG had decent production values. And any good acting at all."

I've heard this show is really good. Someone tell me when that kicks in and maybe I can pick it up from there.

Also, someone please explain to me this series' history with Deep Space Nine. Did one directly rip off the other?

Friday, November 11, 2005

Again with that Comic Con documentary

Now you can watch it on the internet.

Nerds in Paradise! The documentary that caused my roommate to say "Dude, you got totally exploited!" Also airing on Current. Enjoy.

On Crises that may or may not be Infinite

Quote of the day, from an Image comics messageboard, in regards to Infinite Crisis:

"really the funny thing about it is it really is a comic EXPLICITLY about how bad DC comics have gotten and how they need to have a crossover in order to fix everything. it's not the subtext of the comic-- that's the TEXT.

it's a DC comic that's just showing all these picture of other DC comics going "can you believe this shit? man, this shit is awful."

i just find that peculiar."

I mean that is a little bit weird, isn't it?

As the pendulum swings

I'm feeling a lot better now, incidentally. I mean, I have felt bad all fall. I wasn't kidding about that. But it'll be fine. Most of the problems plaguing me this week have been resolved, so onward and upward and all that. I'll also say that I have exceedingly supportive and generous friends, without whom I would be a broken shell of a man. (For evidence, see: freshman year of college.)

American Office

You know, the American Office is really growing on me. I think it's really come into its own, and I've found myself looking forward to it each week. It's clearly unwelling to plumb the depth of feeling that the British version did (particularly the lows), but it's a success on its own generally affable terms. The B plot of this last episode? The bit with Michael's screenplay? That slayed me.

I have also developed a large crush on Jenna Fischer, who plays Pam, so there's that, too.

Thursday, November 10, 2005

My eyes are bleeding

All I did last night was watch television. All off the DVR, of course. Timeslots and commercials are for suckers.

Watched last night:

House
Family Guy
American Dad
The Boondocks
Top Model
Veronica Mars
Lost
My Name Is Earl
The Office
Threshold


Wow. Uh, that's a lot. I fast forwarded thorugh some of it (especially Lost), and I fell asleep for most of Threshold, but damn. Still, that's all my TV viewing for the week. Now I can run wild and free.

The Mars? Still great. And man, this season is DARK. They're bumping people off left and right. At least Cliff is back! Cliff always wins.

Lost is a lot easier to take when you can fast forward through large chunks of flashbacks/people walking through the jungle. Also, Lost totally pulled a Rising Stars (here's an entire episode about a character who is going to die so that you will hopefully feel bad when they die because we never bothered to develop her because we are not the best writers). Okay, really only the first half of that applies to Rising Stars.

There is no purer pleasure than Top Model on TV right now. Leslie's out of town, so I really missed being catty at the screen with her. Anyway, I'm rooting primarily for Kim, with Nicole second. Kim because she's a smartass, and Nicole because she is goofy and funny and pretty as hell (although she's about as sharp as a ball bearing). Bre is great in person, but her modeling sucks. Nik's a good model, but a nonentity. Jayla is increasingly awful, and Lisa is heinous personified. Kim beating Lisa at the acting challenge this week was pure satisfaction.

Boondocks was pretty funny. That show has a lot of potential, although Regina King still sounds too much like a girl.

And while I didn't watch it last night, I've started into the third season of Arrested Development. Still the funniest show on TV. Probably the funniest show in the last ten years (The Simpsons's best seasons are out of that range by now, right?). The ending of the latest episode? Where Charlize Theron left a note? Oh my God. I lost my shit. Just lost the hell out of it.

Tuesday, November 08, 2005

Glargh

You know, this has been kind of a shitty fall for me. Let's hope winter is better, yes?

I mean, there've been some decent times, but it's occurred to me that I've been in a relatively crummy mood since September.

Rawr!

It's a new Atrox comic, y'all. I'm getting alarmingly adept at this whole "internet" thing.

Monday, November 07, 2005

There are not enough drugs in the world...

...to fully comprehend Adult Swim's output these days. I think the shows are getting away from the genius/weird that was the norm for the later seasons of Space Ghost and early episodes of Aqua Teens, and heading towards the "doesn't make sense and is no longer funny" vibe that plagued later episodes of Sealab. The mandate for new material doesn't seem to be "funnier," it seems to be "the more fucked up it is, the more the college kids smoking weed while watching us will be delighted." Also, "the cruder the art style, the less money we have to spend."

12 oz. Mouse does have possibly the best title sequence on television, though.

Friday, November 04, 2005

My lovely lady WHAT?

I'm sorry, but if you like the song "My Humps" by the Black Eyed Peas, we are no longer friends.

A brief history of my relationship with this song: Emory had much enjoyed the Peas' "Elephunk," so he bought their new album without hesitation. One afternoon, he called me into his room. "Jeff," he said, "I need you to listen to this song. Tell me that it's not worst thing you've ever heard." Then he played "My Humps." It was, indeed, one of the worst things I'd ever heard. For those who haven't heard it, the chorus goes a little something like this:

I’m a make, make, make, make you scream
Make u scream, make you scream.
Cos of my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump.
My hump, my hump, my hump, my lovely lady lumps.

Sort of like a naughty Doctor Seuss rhyme, isn't it? But it's even worse set to music. Fergie sings it in a way that makes her sound like a really dumb 12-year-old. She sounds like she doesn't understand what she's saying and is just saying it so the boys will pay attention to her. And also, "LOVELY LADY LUMPS"??? As Sarah noted last night, "When I hear 'lump' I think of breast cancer." Ugh! Oh, it's awful! Anyway, Emory sold the CD back to Amoeba, and the terror had passed.

Except now it's a single. And it regularly tops the list of most downloaded songs on the Apple main website. And last night I saw two people perform it at karaoke. It's ALREADY on karaoke. God help us all.

We kicked its ass

A new Atrox strip is up for your viewing pleasure. Emory, Leslie, and I put it up on the internet all by ourselves. We totally beat up the internet and made it cry for its mother. Then when we tried to put the blog post up on the main page, Blogger wouldn't do it. For hours. Apparently the internet was sore that we beat it so bad. But everything's okay now. I think.

Thursday, November 03, 2005

TURMOIL!

Naturally, since my non-work life is getting crazy, my work life has decided to follow suit. I have a million things to do before Friday here at work, so how am I ever going to do the TWO million things I have to do at home? I ask you.

"Gee Jeff, maybe you shouldn't post on your blog while you should be working." Shut up! This post is SHORT! And will most likely be all you get today.

So I guess we're moving. Into the building we loved so much when we saw it a few months ago. We'll be on Las Palmas, about a block south of Sunset. Oh man. That will be just GREAT.

I tried to put up the new Atrox comic, really I did. I just don't know what the problem is. Stupid internet. I'll get it right this evening.

Wednesday, November 02, 2005

"He tasted like beets"

Y'all read yesterday's Atrox strip, right? Of course you did.

Halloween Night

A brief narrative, in which our hero treks from Poinsettia to Argyle down Hollywood Boulevard on foot, and waits for his bus for a considerable time. The time: 12:15 AM to about 1:20 AM. The day: While technically November 1st, it's still Halloween in everyone's head. For some reason, I've written it in the first person. Enjoy.


My iPod died on the way down to Frank's, so it's now impossible for me to screen out the considerable amount of drunk and rowdy people who are filling Hollywood Boulevard. I keep my eyes straight ahead and charge along at my typically brisk walking pace. This tends to blow off the crazies and/or beggars.

I've just left Frank's, and I'm still a little buzzed from the vodka I had there while we watched Ed Wood. Frank had never seen that movie all the way through, which floored me, since I had seen it in the theater opening weekend with Emroy and his dad and it had been one of my favorites ever since. Seeing that movie in the a sparsely populated theater at Ward Parkway was one of the first times in my life I could look around and think "I'm surrounded by gay dudes" and be totally correct. The audience was mostly couples, and there were maybe two women. Just one of those things you remember.

Anyway, I'm trucking down Hollywood Boulevard, since the 217 bus is nowhere in sight. If I could catch a 217, it could take me all the way to Hollywood and Vermont, where I could wait for the 180 or 181 in relative peace. Still, the amount of people on the street means the nighttime trek down the Boulevard won't be nearly as creepy as it's been the other times I've done this at an absurd hour. But it does increase the likelihood that I'll get harassed. When it's 1 AM and there aren't many people on the street, everyone minds their own business. But tonight it's Halloween, and people are drunk, so tact and personal boundaries are right out the window.

Lots of people are in costume. Most of the women I see are dressed in "sexy" Halloween costumes like "sexy maid" and the like. I see a disturbing number of "sexy Snow Whites," which fills me with feelings I'd rather not have. Maybe I don't like Halloween because it is sexual-frustration-a-go-go. Then again, maybe it's because I just don't like dressing up.

So like I said, I'm racing along as fast as my legs can carry me. Despite my speed, I still get the occasional comment thrown my way. I'm wearing my Flash T-shirt, along with a suit jacket(?) that Leslie lent me for a costume I never actually ended up wearing. However, the jacket fit great and looks pretty good on me, so I'm borrowing it until Leslie decides to get it tailored to fit her. (Those who dined with me on Sunday will note that I am wearing the exact same clothes that I had the night before. I know. I am classy.) The comments I get are mostly just "Hey! Flash!" or "Hey, it's the Flash!" or "Nice outfit!" I only have time to register the comment and maybe throw a quick smile in the direction it came from before I'm too far away.

Now even under the best circumstances, I don't like walking slowly, so I've gotten pretty adept at weaving through crowds. So I'm snaking this way and that avoiding slow movers, clumps of chatters, and those who just attach themselves to the wall of the nearest building to gawk/yell at the passers by. Several times I duck out in the street and walk along the curb to avoid particularly dire bottlenecks. One time I do this a guy calls out "Look out!" and I turn and notice a car barreling down on me. I hop back up on the sidewalk and call out "Thanks" to the guy who shouted. "Can you spare a dollar?" he asks. "Oh, sorry," I say, and zip by. Not even charity can slow me down! Everyone's moving so slowly. I'm rocketing past these people. I'm the fastest man alive.

I finally arrive at the bus stop/subway station at Hollywood and Argyle, across from the Pantages. As soon as I walk up, I'm accosted by a short girl who couldn't be older than 20. Her eyes droop and I can't decide if she is drunk or if she's always like this. Two other girls watch her from where they're sitting nearby. "Excuse me," she slurs, "You speak English, right?" I am the whitest person in my field of vision. "Yes," I say. "Can you help us?" she asks. "Our car broke down and my sisters and I are trying to get to our grandma in Van Nuys." "Sorry," I say, "I don't have any cash. Just my bus pass." This is a lie, but she's lying to me, so I figure we're even.

I sit down and look around. As I do, two guys and a girl walk by, slurring ridiculously.

Guy 1: "Dudes, it's this way!"
Guy 2: "Dude, you're going the wrong way. The car's this way."
Guy 1: "IT'S THIS WAY!"
Guy 2: (following Guy 1) "It's this way."
Girl: (under her breath) "Oh, snap."

The 217 comes by, but I decide to wait here for the 180, because this is way more entertaining than the corner of Vermont and Hollywood, I'm sure.

I look over at The Frolic Room, and a girl with cute hair is talking with tow doofy-looking guys outside the bar. The girl is adorable. She's not wearing a costume, so I like her already. One of the guys reaches out and touches her arm. The touch lasts just a little too long for comfort. It reminds me of something I would do while I was drunk, which grosses me out. Maybe I'm reading it wrong. Maybe that guy is her boyfriend. I could take that guy. Him and his friend. They're taller than me, but they're doofy. And I have a vicious streak. Yeah, I could take those guys. The girl blows the guys off and heads into the bar. Yeah, you tell 'em, girl. You're too good for those guys. If I didn't have to wait for this bus I could run over to the bar and chat you up. But who knows when this bus is going to show up. Sorry, girl.

Nothing much interesting happens for like 20 minutes.

When the bus finally comes, I get on, along with about 25 other people, including the three sisters who wanted my money. I sit across from two girls, and one of them is clearly in love with the other. The one who's in love is always touching the other one (who's prettier), in a way that's less friendly and more flirty. Constant caresses, little hugs, and leaning on her shoulder. And she's keeping up a constant stream of chatter while regularly fishing for compliments ("You think I'm pretty right? Tell me that I'm pretty.") A guy is sitting next to them, and is trying to chat up the prettier one. He gives the pretty girl his number, and when he gets off the bus, the other girl says "Where's his card?" When the pretty one gives it to her, she throws it away.

I get off the bus before they do, as well as before the three sisters, who should have gotten off several stops ago if they wanted to get to Van Nuys. It's almost 2 AM. Won't get much sleep tonight. Tomorrow is going to suck.