Wednesday, February 28, 2007

We got fun and games

The ads for Top Model on MySpace have the tagline, "Welcome to the jungle, ladies." Surely I am not the only one who immediately immagines Axl wailing, "You're gonna DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIE!!!!!!!!" Right? Also, Top Model would be a thousand times better if they had to fight. Just sayin'.

Friday, February 23, 2007

A minor problem

You know, the version of iTunes I have on my computer now might not support one of these new-fangled iPods. I'd probably need to fix my internet first. Stupid broken internet.

Thursday, February 22, 2007

What's going on in web comics?

It's only a few strips in, but this Achewood story where Ray realizes he's switched from an ass man to a breast man is well worth your time. Of course Achewood is worth all of your time, all the time.

Dinosaur Comics continues to be awesome. (The one before this one is worth a look, too.)

While autobio comics are generally dire, I super-recommend The Fart Party. Just in general. It's rad.

The fourth panel to this Overcompensating is something I regularly ask myself.

Still sick

So through the weekend I was feeling so much better, but the moment I went back to work my health went back in the toilet. I've just spent the last two nights curled up watching television. Last night I fell asleep at 9:30. Normally colds work their way through my system a lot faster than this. Stupid illness.

Hey, there's a new Atrox comic today.

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

iPod or bike?

It is the dilemma facing me today.

I got my bonus last week, and after paying off various debts and putting some into savings, I should have enough left for either a bike or an iPod (most likely a 4GB Nano).

You know, I was going to talk about the advantages and disadvantages of each, but I think I will go for the iPod. Well, that was easy. This is probably why I don't update my blog as often as I used to.

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Some things that happened during the weekend

Saturday night was the big masquerade party. Most everyone looked great and had cool masks. That's really about all I have to say about it.

During the day on Sunday Frank, Emory, Leslie and I went to Swingers for the most star-studded lunch ever, and then Frank had to go to some audition so the rest of us caught Ghost Rider at the Arclight. You know, it wasn't too bad. It didn't take itself very seriously and it seemed to acknowledge that a biker with a flaming skull for a head is equal parts awesome and retarded. And Nic Cage goofed it up for maximum enjoyability. Really, as far as comic book adaptations go, you could do worse.

Sunday night was Lisa's birthday, celebrated with Mexican food and bowling, two things I can really get behind. I bowled like crap during our first game and got all pissed about it, much to Laurel's amusement, but I did much better the second game, getting a turkey and generally just bowling better. Then they shut down the alley so I didn't get to finish my game. Whatever, bowling alley! But it was a good time and happy birthday to Lisa (since today is her real birthday). Now I really want to go bowling again.

Yesterday Frank and I stopped by Danny and Katherine's (my second visit there this weekend, since Laurel, Corinne, and I stopped by before Lisa's party). We watched King of Kong, which was an amazing Slamdance documentary about a guy trying to beat the world record for highest score on Donkey Kong. Should it ever come out theatrically or on DVD, I wholeheartedly recommend it. Then Frank went to work and Kim showed up and we played Double Dash and Super Mario Strikers. We also played with Danny and Katherine's adorable new pug puppy Waffles, who is a Cute Factory. Also she thinks my face is the world's most delicious thing.

Later on back at Llama School Laurel came over and we watched 24 (still awesome!) and finally caught Episode III, which lived up to the hype of being the best of the prequels while still being very bad. At least with that movie you could say "This idea was okay, but the excecution was bad," instead of "This idea was stupid from the get-go," like with the other two movies.

Saturday, February 17, 2007

Adventures in cable TV

I just sat at home last night, mustering strength for the activities beginning tonight, and cable TV saw fit to reward me by showing me some of my favorites scenes of various movies.

First, Logan's Run was on TCM, and there was only a five-minute wait until BOX. If you don't know about Box, I pity you. But rest assured it is Box's job... TO FREEZE YOU! Also, CAN YOU BELIEVE YOUTUBE DOES NOT HAVE THE BOX SCENE??? I can't. The closest I could find was this. Funny, but doesn't really give you the whole breadth of excellence that is Box. Get on it, YouTube. I am ready... and you're ready.

Second, Scream was on HBO (it's now been over 10 YEARS since that movie was realesed!), and I only had to wait a scant few minutes before one of favorite lines in anything: "BAM! Bitch went down! 'I'll send you a copy.' BAM! Sid: SUPERBITCH!" One might say that is PERFECT DIALOGUE. I might be the one to say that.

And then I got up today and thought "Man, maybe I should do something," but then Primal Fear was on USA, and it wasn't just going to watch itself.

Friday, February 16, 2007

The facts

FACT: Nextwave #12 is PUREST BLISS.

FACT: Ghost Rider comes out today. Will I see it? Emory's become quite taken with it (despite Daredevil's crushing awfulness), so the answer is "quite possibly."

FACT: I am sick but getting better. I am trying to preserve my strength so that I am somewhat attentive for the masquerade party tomorrow, so perhaps tonight will not contain crazy antics. Perhaps tonight will only consists of Smackdown viewing. We'll see.

FACT: I have taken President's Day as my floating holiday. Three-day weekend! I hope I am not sick for much of it.

FACT: I am almost finished with The Fortress of Solitude. I like Jonathan Lethem's work.

FACT: Last night's Office was great, and directed by Joss Whedon. Although it is kind of ridiculous that Whedon directed the episode that mentions vampires.

FACT: Seriously, Nextwave had me on the floor.

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

From the "too stupid to be made up" files

It is important that you read this.

There really aren't words. Yes, it's really a comic you can go and buy.

Tuesday, February 13, 2007


As all good little children know, the comic book Nextwave is completely awesome. How awesome, you might ask? Here is the promo copy for the last issue, coming out tomorrow:
"The Story: To all those who HAVEN’T been buying NEXTWAVE–
Thanks a lot, jerks! This is the last issue! To all those who HAVE been buying NEXTWAVE– YOU RULE!! Do not miss this pulse-pounding conclusion to the greatest work of western literature EVER! Hamlet? Horrible. War and Peace? What-a-joke! The Great Gatsby? The Great Lame-by, maybe. Those works are going to be moved to the Bad Section of your local bookstores after this issue comes out. Don't miss this or you won’t know what your children’s children are reading in school.
32 PGS./Parental Advisory …$2.99"
I love that. It's just so juvenile and excellent.

Dear Fox promos team...

(24 spoilers to follow)

You've done a fine job so far telling us how much 24 ROCKS ASS this season. And it has indeed rocked ass. HOWEVER, please do me a favor and quit ruining stuff in the next episode promos. From just watching a 30-second clip, we now alread know that Milo and weird-sexy Rena Sofer get away from their pursuers thanks to some timely Jack interference, and that Sofer spills the beans about Jack's dad's involvement. I'm sure this is just a launching pad for new adventures, but dammit, we didn't need to know that yet! Let us hang on the edge of our seats just a little bit more! I mean, the show's doing great. Just don't blow it for us.

Attention 13-year-old boys!

I have found your perfect movie!

It is called DOA: Dead or Alive and it is based on the popular video game franchise. You young people like video games, right? It was directed by the guy who made The Transporter, and who doesn't like The Transporter? Old people, that's who. Anyway, DOA features hot women in bikins and kung fu fighting. Sometimes it features these things simultaneously. Plotwise, it's very reminiscent of Mortal Kombat, only with less killing and more nanotech. And again, boobs. I know how you youngsters like to masturbate. It stars weird-faced Devon Aoki and alarmingly-muscled Jamie Pressley (basically just playing a nicer version of her My Name is Earl character). There are also several other hot women. They all go to an island and beat the shit out of each other, and sometimes play beach volleyball. The end. Also, Eric Roberts is the villain. Ask your parents who he is.

Oh, and the movie never actually got released in the US for some reason, so hopefully you all have a region-free DVD player! Happy viewing!

Monday, February 12, 2007

Beloved children's classics

So I guess they're bringing back Nancy Drew.

That's all well and good, but what about the Hardy Boys? I for one would love to see a big-screen Hardy Boys movie, only it should star the WWE's Matt and Jeff Hardy, and when they discover the smugglers or whoever, instead of calling the authorities the Hardys deliver a beatdown culminating in a Twist of Fate and a swanton. I think that would be great.

Either that or an adaptaion of that one modern book where Joe's (or was it Frank's?) girlfriend is blown up by terrorists. Either way.

The playlist of my brain

What's been stuck in my head the last week?

-The song David Bowie sings about Ricky Gervais on Extras ("See his pug-nosed face!")
-The two half-remembered Lily Allen songs from when I saw her on SNL a week ago.
-The music from the latest iPod commercial (apparently it is The Fratellis)
-"No One Is Alone" from Into the Woods
-A rotation of the five or so songs I really like from the new Shins album

Given half a minute with nothing particular to think about, my mind will invariably start playing one of those tunes. It's an eclectic mix.

Friday, February 09, 2007

Needs purchasing

Leslie, we should get these! They are available as magnets!

"I'm not the one who paid five million dollars for a blowjob!"
"I... it was a half-and-half. First of all."

Thursday, February 08, 2007

So now I'm not enthused

I had a few things I wanted to put up over the past few days, but since Blogger wouldn't let me log in I've either forgotten them or lost all interest.

I was going to say some stuff about how Heroes and 24 are both kicking ass, and maybe some more stuff about wrestling and how ECW seems to slowly be getting its shit together.

Oh wait, I can't pass up laying this quote on you.

"Everybody in the goddamn world knows who I am! Except maybe me sometimes."
-Ric Flair

Okay, so I took that out of context to make him seem senile, although when he said it it did seem like the promo was getting away from him.

I saw a headline on MSN the other day that said something like "Manning rains supreme" and gave no indication that it was supposed to be a pun, so I'm going to go ahead and assume the worst about MSN's editors.

I did watch the Superbowl, over at Matt's house. The first half was crazy-go-nuts, and after that it just seemed sort of obvious that the Broncos were the better team (by which I of course mean the Colts. Thank you, Laurel. I've been making that goof since the playoffs). Commercials were pretty low-key too, although props to the one with Robert Goulet skittering about like a horrible demon.

Anything else? I don't think so. Ta for now.

Long dormant

Folks, I have been trying to update this blog for the last three days, and Blogger just now saw fit to let me log in.

I haven't abandoned you. Blogger can just eat a dick.

Here's an ace Dinosaur Comics to show there's no hard feelings.