Thursday, March 10, 2005

Scariest thing ever

Last night I was over at Frank's and Paul was there, and we did some writing but mostly we just shot the shit and drank a little and had a good time late into the night.

Then, on my way home, the terror happened.

As I was heading onto the 101 I noticed that it was pretty foggy. Actually, it was really foggy. I didn't remember ever seeing it this foggy in LA. Anyway, no terror yet. Just some atmospheric fog. And by the time I got off the 101 to make my little sidestreet journey to the 134, the fog had cleared up. No big deal, I thought. So I turn right onto Forest Lawn, and there’s no fog, so I’m thinking all is well. But then the moment I’m far enough away from the intersection, the fog rolls in as if it is chasing me. I can barely see. Then I hit the point in Forest Lawn where there aren’t any street lamps AND where you can’t see any other city lights anywhere around you. I’m talking PITCH BLACK. Now pitch darkness is something you can come across fairly easily in Kansas City. Heck, there was a little road not five minutes from my house that didn’t have a single street light and was flanked on both sides by extremely tall, foreboding trees. It also had a rickety, single-lane bridge to complete the atmosphere. So pitch darkness is something I can deal with. But it’s not something I often experience in LA, so that combined with the extremely thick fog gave me a severe case of the heebie-jeebies. I just knew that this was the moment where the terrifying little girl from Ringu or Ju-On or Ring-On would leap out from the inky darkness and attach herself to my windshield like a remora, her black, twisted heart bent on my grisly murder.

Then I got to the part of Forest Lawn where there were lights again and all seemed well. Only it was the lights of the gigantic cemetery! And then the zombies attacked!


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